How to Read Donald Duck

Duck out and watch your feathers! The new McDuck adventures have arrived in town and they are crazier than the past cartoons. That without to forget the other friendly franchise: the Looney Toons.

Yes, you have guessed right. This monthly essay is going to be a bit cartoony. Because who does not love good cartoons, jokes, sense of humour or a good Monty Python sketch. Oh, wait, that you do not find those things funny? What are you doing here then? Well, at least you are a cockney freak and you like to tell to your darling my duck… I know, it sounds pretty weird.

Ducks aside, this is not going to be a post noticing about the abilities of the water birds, neither about the multiple definitions of the word but you can put your ducks and to be ready to enjoy this loony trip about how the different points of view on this planet read the things which surround us.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

All started alike the good stories with: “Once upon a time…” or “There was a legend…” However, it seemed in any moment of the basic education it was left in certain corners of the world to teach correctly what fiction meant. And I am talking about basic narrative fiction that when we put images, or advertisement to the game this reading issues complicates exponentially elevated to the one trillion million duck. Because it is all about ducks and waterbirds and the one who has the fault of everything is not other than Disney himself. No, not the theme parks or the studio franchise if not the man who gave life to Mickey, Donald and all the friends at the Disney Club.

Although, before to start to tell how people read so different the same issue I am going to tell you a gossip fact. Not for nothing. The other day, I learnt Blake Lively was the original Gossip Girl and it seems that to gossip between certain circles and to talk bad about girls is what it really matters. So, I am going to give the Queen’s crown to Blake because she really knows about gossiping and not a bunch of ducks, I mean swans… or were they some twins which were born from an egg for something involved with Zeus…? Yeah, I had never clear that point about the Argus or the Argonauts…

Well, the fact is that Donald has always been a bit jealous of Mickey. This is something which not so many folks know. You must have a high degree in cartoon history to know this issues but, I can assure you it is the truth. He always wanted that it was not called House of Mouse if not House of Duck instead. But after Mickey was kidnapped and Donald was arrested for to be suspicious of to have plotted everything for their rivalry and after some Stolen Cartoons and Timon and Pumba intervention everything was solved and Donald decided to work together with Mickey as a partner to make the club profitable and successful. Crazy, right? I have not seen a single episode of Gossip Girl but do not deny this is not a good gossiping plot. We just need to put some lipstick, mascara and tonnes of fashion to wrap it.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

No, really, I am going to be serious -not really-. The problem did not start with Donald if not with Mufasa. I really have a trauma with this. Wasn’t it enough that he died on the film that then it arrives a series of people and they tried to teach us how to read “right” the “secrets” on the Disney films and cartoons starting with the girl in bikini hidden on the Mufasa’s snout? They justify their visions saying that, maybe, the guy who drew that put the hidden symbol intentionally but, maybe, he did not and it was his subconscious the one who was playing with him revealing to the world that obvious Freudian clue and interpretation… *Please, add suspense music here*

And is in these moments when you are at class and you elbow the fellow next to you and say: “Pinch me. This must be a nightmare or something.” But no one pinches you because everybody is equally shocked with their jaws hanging almost to the floor level.

Let’s see, ducky Freudians, you are taking my childhood putting it on an electric mixer, cracking my brain and making mash potatoes with all of that to eat yourselves your own symbols and interpretations. Do you think that is a healthy diet? I duck out! You cannot see a sexual interpretation in everything! Well, indeed you can. I know it, I have been experiencing for long on my own feathers but… It is outrageous.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

It is a fact, the whole world sees everything with different eyes and if in the East the white is the meaning of mourning, in the West we have chosen the black for to express the same. So, it is completely logical that each people will interpret any message very differently. Until here, there is logic, compression and sense but… To look for secret symbols and meanings to everything? Hold on, this is a bit too much ducking.

It seems there are so many ducks everywhere and no, I am not talking about Donald. I am talking about the sort of ones whom throw the stone and duck themselves saying: “It hasn’t been me. It was a metaphor of the metaphor.” And then, there is the sort of people who believe that everything is created or written, inspired thinking on them… The love declarations start and: “Oh my duck, I love you so much.”, “My pumpkin, I love you too.” We can also add other ingredients to the table like oranges, coffee, watermelons and why not all sort of birds.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

I must confess, at the beginning, I did not understand anything of this either. My Wonderland world mixed with Freudians, symbols and secret meanings was so complex that I needed to go back to the path of logic to figure out what was going on. Because the problem is not that anybody reads differently if not when the world insist in to look for metaphors and the connotations to them or the cultural background is quite different. Like, for example, on the colours previous explanation.

So you must learn the hidden meanings of one side and other. Then, check everything is quite insane and, arrived at that point, make like with the politics: send everyone who tries to make politics of your work to pick up coconuts because they are really nuts on their “coco” (Translation from Spanish: head).

It is complicated I must confess it. Going back to the historical facts because I am quite geeked. There were rough times in the world when there was World War II. That was not a story, a myth or a legend. And on those times everybody was shaken by certain Imperialism tendency from the bad guys who called themselves the Axis. So, in those times, it was created the white propaganda to fight the mechanical propaganda. And with that, Disney and Warner Bros created a bunch of war cartoons to encourage the soldiers who played in League. Honestly, I prefer the ones in which Donald is at instruction or the Snafu Soldier but, in this case, I am using screenshots of The Fuhrer’s Face for illustrating this because if you watch it. You could find the secret symbols hidden everywhere: even in the clouds. Not kidding. Watch it.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Obviously, the cartoon piece is a parody of what was happening at those times but after my past studies, I noticed there was a tendency which applied the mechanical propaganda interpretations to everything. And I mean, EVERYTHING. Even the colour of your socks. So beware, ducks! Someone could be watching and classifying you on political tendencies only for the underwear you wear. Be a patriot, you know what it is best for your work.

Everything started with some people who wrote a series of books called How to Read Donald and Mickey Mouse and the Lost of the Innocence. It seemed that someone wanted to interpret on those war cartoons a series of messages and they started to look frame to frame Disney even on Mufasa’s snout. It arrived at the point that they insisted in to look so much that obviously, they found things; but then, they wanted to put an interpretation on them. And here, it varies depending on the different backgrounds and connotations. Ones will tell you that Disney is not educating if not perverting the kids on a consumerism fever creating them fantasies and fake dreams which will never come true. Others will tell you that Disney has been used all these years (not only on the WWII stage) for to sell the American Imperialism and to impose their ways on the rest of the countries… Conclusion, some of these folks declare themselves from conservative political tendencies, others call themselves socialist (Labour), others call themselves saviours, others call themselves communist. But the facts are clear: all of them hate Disney films, Mickey, his friends and Donald Duck.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Why? I mean, Why? Donald was the first duck who taught me to count on a strange film which is called Donald and the Numbers and which it was difficult to understand, he is Donald, but he talked about Fibonacci. And that marked me so much that I put the numbers and this fellow in almost all my writings. Then, it arrived at my life The Yellow Submarine by The Beatles and my whole world counting lesson changed. What it was clear was the Glove was the bad guy.

However, and leaving to one side hating feelings which are more proper of the Sith than of the real truth hippies. I must confess the problem of all this look for “hidden” meaning it is not other than the abuse of to apply the mechanical propaganda. Now, also called “guerrilla marketing” which pretends to manipulate others using different complex methods of fake profiles, bullying… To make people upset, talk about that and… Bingo, free advertisement of the cause that they want to sell. Fancy but not very ethical. Still, so many forget to assist to the ethical classes because they were very boring and useless. That is a fact too.

Basically, the issue here is those people do not understand about planning. They look for the immediate feedback and like there is not an answer because sometimes a trailer is just a teaser; well, they insist in to look for an answer, a deep meaning or some hidden issues -which are not real- to give explanations to a McGuffin, or a simple artist’s signature. Both of the last ones are high concepts which are only revealed in teaching techniques to Jedi masters. Since Star Wars is part of Disney you cannot hate Disney if you want to be a Jedi. It would be senseless.

The problem is, in our days, everybody in social media has the right of to talk about anything and to know about everything more than anyone. Fact, which also happens in real life but you can cut quick saying: “Talk to the hand.” However, in social media you cannot start blocking everybody -it is not polite- and Zuckerberg keeps without to inventing the dislike button. So bad… So people keep spreading their interpretations and theories only with the faith and the dreams of to “be someone” when they are not aware that for to “be someone” you do not need followers if not to work hard and to prove that you really are a busy bee and not a duck. And the problem here is there are so many ducks disguised in bee’s suits or thinking they are wheel horses when in fact they are a bunch of geese.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer's Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

Donald Duck at The Fuhrer’s Face. Picture courtesy Walt Disney Studios.

The conclusion of the conclusion after the conclusion: Donald had a terrible nightmare. We hope he will awake and to stop believing everything is written for him or for some sort of secret hide and seek game which he needs to keep playing. Please, Donald, we all know your rivalries with Mickey. Leave them to one side or you will become the Duck’s Sith and that is not nice. It would be like the duck’s version of The Empire Strikes Back.

For my part, I am going to keep applying my old philosophy of Peace and Love, Live and Let Die, Let it Be and, of course, my otter style. Without to forget that I have learnt it from Dory that, sometimes, life is easy and happier if you forget things. So, I do not remember what all of this about symbols is about? Do you remember it?

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